morning thoughts

there is nothing outside of ourselves that we can ever snuggle too comfortably into. there is no real security ever in the physical world. any freedom grasped within it is merely an illusion, or perhaps an echo, a reflection, of the truer freedom we are invited to open into, a momentary experience to remind us of what is always ours to claim, or to finally make the hunger for more of the same draw us painfully toward the only thing that truly satisfies.

the exterior will always crumble, whether by storm or by season, by violence or time. and if we grow too dependent upon it, begin to mistake the incarnation for the holy, cling to it or get lost in it, or grow addicted to its fixes jumping from one experience of safety to another without following them to their source, skipping across the surface of life like a water bug across the lake…never diving deeper for fear of being consumed, yet never truly safe.  

when the only constantly available security lies in the depths, beneath the whims of wind and waves and surf. or in the ground of the earth, beneath the falling trees, the fading blossoms, the frost bitten leaves, receiving all the changing moments deep into the self as nourishment.

this momentary pain, these tears dripping the angst of powerlessness, helplessness, remind me that i have no control at all over the illusory. i cannot will my world to remain safe. i cannot make it forever look the way my fear desires it to be. but i can choose to see.

and i can choose to return to this place of stillness, this place where chaos cannot touch. this place of being held in a security inviolable. this place of knowing
all is well.

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